Photo credit – Be Grateful by SnoShuu on Flickr

I am grateful:

• For God for His unconditional love and His provision
• For my parents who brought me up and raised me to become who I am today
• For my husband who loves me with all his might, takes care of me, and watches out for me, paying extra attention during the entire pregnancy
• For my parents-in-law who take me as their own child
• For my brother for being…my brother
• For my friends who are genuine and always there for me
• For my teachers who have provided me with their guidance and their knowledge
• For a job that I enjoy doing, and for the wonderful relationship I have with my colleagues
• For the roof over our heads, the food on our table and the clothes covering us
• For the country that I live in and the one that I call home

8 March 2008. Hardly forgettable—we had our Holy Matrimony ceremony at the courtyard of a quaint lil’ restaurant in KL, on the 12^th General Election Day! It would have been even more memorable if we went to vote in our wedding attire!

2 years on, we’ve gone through so many milestones in the last 365 days. My top 3 were:

• We made it to Paris for our 2^nd express honeymoon
• We made a baby! Zachary Wang will join us anytime from mid-March
• We bought our 2^nd home, which will be ready in 2012

To my hubba bubba and my soul mate, I love you more and more each day.

Dear David, I love you more and more, day after day after day.

Photo credit – American Dollar 2 by thinkpanama on Flickr

How does one define how rich one is? Some measure with the amount of cash you have, others measure by number of tangible assets or what investments are in your basket, and a certain few may judge based on your personal outlook (from the car you drive to the clothes you wear).

Our society also has a very predictable mindset at how happy you could be if you are rich. Just last week I was following a discussion over the radio, the DJs asked listeners what they’d do if they were suddenly handed RM 1,000,000 cash. Without much surprise, typical answers were:

1. buy a big house
2. go for a holiday
3. purchase a luxury car
4. quit working

Looking at the answers, we can’t help but dream about spending that RM 1 million, or taking that much awaited Safari retreat in Africa, or just plain resigning from that daily grind called “the job”. But what is real wealth? Is that RM 1 million really going to sustain you until the day you leave Earth? Does the measure of richness in the form of assets owned really define your status of wealth? If you drive a Ferrari it means you’re probably pretty high society?

First of all, we have to move away from the traditional mindset of what wealth really is. Yes, inevitably we need to have some form of income to live our lives, to put food on the table, a roof over our heads, and clothes to cover ourselves. I’m not saying that we shouldn’t aim to advance in our careers, or attempt to look for ways to make more money. The problem is, we become greedy, and we want more. The main reason for this happening is, WE KEEP COMPARING OURSELVES TO OTHERS’ WEALTH. Greed in turn means that we are never satisfied with what we have, what enough is and when it is enough!

Last year David bought a book by Ramit Sethi, simply titled “I Will Teach You To Be Rich”. It’s a no-nonsense, straight-in-your-face personal finance book. Honestly, I was quite put off by the title of the book, thinking, “Hey, another get-rich-quick-type-of-book”. To my surprise, Ramit helped me re-align my definition of wealth, and re-organised the way I looked at being rich. Of course, there were some parts of the book that were very US-centric (i.e. taxes, investments) but the rest of the topics discussed are very relevant, regardless if you’re in Timbuktu. Using the book as a guide, I had re-constructed my personal finances (streamlining credit cards & bank accounts, decided on investment choices, and revamped my spending budget); I could see clearly what being rich is to me.

So here’s my definition of wealth:

1. Be in as little debt as possible – no credit card debts (yahoo!), really short hire-purchase loan terms (i.e. 5 years rather than 10 years), and flexible home loan terms (loans that allow you to reduce the % interest charged based on a reduction in amount owing)
2. Ability to save 20% of income every month without feeling like you don’t have enough spending money (i.e. you are not reducing your lifestyle to zero). I have an allotted amount of guilt free spending money which I use for shopping, food and entertainment, and really spending it without guilt!
3. Invest 10% of income every month automatically for long term returns.
4. Pay my income tax yearly, responsibly.
5. Review and minimise commitments and eliminate the unnecessary (i.e. review Astro packages, mobile phone plans)

I know I am rich when I can live comfortably without worrying about needing to make more money to maintain the lifestyle I’ve chosen; or indulging in yearly holidays without having to sacrifice something else for it. I know I am rich when I have the minimum amount of debt I’m in (so why dream of having a big house or drive a big car when I can be debt free quicker with what I have now … see the point of having just enough?). I know I’m rich when over the years I’ve extra income that I can grow my investments or save even more!

When we take away our greed factor, take away the comparing attitude, and take away the mentality that wealth means having everything big and great, you’ll find that you enjoy living your life more comfortably and you’re happier with what you have. We need to find that sweet spot of being contented and having enough. We’ll never be rich if we keep growing our commitments every time we have extra income—instead of improving our well being we’re putting ourselves in more debt! So if I had RM 1 million handed to me, I’d go on a holiday, and invest the rest of the money. ‘Nuff said.

P/S: I also enjoyed reading this article, which talks about how money was once the currency of a successful life, wealth is increasingly being measured in connection, sustainability and happiness. Read more about “Finding The Way To A Meaningful Life“

1. Celebrated my momma’s 60^th birthday. She was born on the 1^st day of CNY in the Year of the Tiger (Western calendar wud be February 18^th). Muffin Wang will be born in the Year of the Tiger too!
2. Gave out less Ang Paus this year cos the 2 red packets per kid ruling was valid only in 2009. Also, received less Ang Paus this year now that the baby bump is so dem obvious. I swear last year we were still happily collecting red packets ok!!
3. Had 5 rounds of Yee Sang without any of the “sang” ingredients. Meaning to say I picked out every visible piece of raw fish, abalone, sea cucumber, jellyfish and just ate the crispy, pickled bits.
4. Spent quality time with my family and my in laws. And got asked numerous times about when Muffin is arriving, is the baby a boy or a girl, and who’s taking care of baby when I get back to work.
5. I barely had to help mom with cooking and cleaning cos I is with child.
6. We had a crazy spread of delicious, yummy food everyday starting from CNY eve!
7. There were so many “free-to-view” fireworks in the neighbourhood *happiness*
8. For the first time, David and I had 2 visitors come for “pai nin” at our small lil’ apartment – one’s Grandma and the other is Dave’s Kajang High School classmate.
9. Never took so many cold showers in a day thanks to the unbearable heat!
10. My last CNY before I’m upgraded to a Momma!

Let’s start with some stats from my check up last weekend:

• EDD is 8 April 2010
• 34 weeks to date
• Muffin’s estimated weight is 2.2kgs and is still currently head-down
• 9 ultrasound scans to date (with 2 printouts + 1 DVD)
• Urine and blood pressure tests & results are normal

Two weeks ago I started charting Muffin’s kicks and boy, what a varied result I’ve been getting. I can count 10 kicks from as little as 3 hours or as long as 7 hours. I notice when I’m busy doing physical chores I’m not aware of the movements as much as if I were stationary. I keep a chart of his kicks and make sure that he’s achieved the 10 kicks within 12 hours rule advised by the midwife from our ante-natal class. Funny thing is, my doctor is like “no need to count lah!”. Bah, I’m counting anyway! I find him kinda selamba sometimes, but he’s very reassuring and I feel at ease everytime we see him. I really trust him with our Muffin. He also did mention that my pregnancy has been very stable throughout and that if *touch wood* Muffin decides to arrive from Week 34 onwards, he’ll be ok. Muffin, don’t come too early k? Mommy needs to wrap up work and then have you. Thanks.

Oh, btw, he “flashed” his kukubird at us during the scan. So definitely no surprises when he comes out cos Muffin’s for sure a boy.

Following up from my blog entry two weeks ago I mentioned that constipation has not been a problem … I was wrong. Coupled with dehydration from the cold I caught just before CNY + the extremely hot weather, I had a bad hemorrhoid problem last week. After 2 days of bed rest, the pain has come to a manageable level and hopefully I’ll be back to a 100% at the end of the week. Right now it’s just a high-fibre diet with lots of fluids (not forgetting prune juice) to help me reduce the possibility of the problem flaring up. My MIL was kind enough to pass me her inflatable donut-shaped pillow so I could be more comfortable at the office (having to sit 8 hours with soreness down there isn’t the best feeling in the world you know?)

We also attended part 2 of 4 of our ante-natal class after our checkup. Breastfeeding and signs of labour were the topics discussed. Quite intense session I must say! I’m determined to breastfeed a hundred percent and have decided not to even buy a can of milk powder to “standby”. Even my Doc was like “don’t buy any milk bottles, and don’t buy any milk powder!”. SDMC is really pro-breastfeeding, and after delivery, we have access to Lactation Specialists who can help us first time mommy’s with breastfeeding support and FAQs. Now, all the momma’s out there please cheer me on ‘cos I know the 1^st week will be the toughest challenge!

In other news, the wish list on our baby registry has been fulfilled! We’re thankful to everyone who has blessed our lil’ Muffin with your thoughtful gifts. We love y’all!

Then CNY came and my most dreaded and common pregnancy problem that I have been reading about extensively in books hit me. I think it kinda snowballed from being dehydrated (with the cold bug, and the extremely hot weather), plus this last couple of weeks I had been rather constipated and the result was a very bad case of hemorrhoids. On Tuesday night it got so bad I could barely walk, stand or sit without feeling extreme pain down south.

Honestly, I thought I was heading straight to surgery! Wednesday morning I went to the doctor’s and got some cream, and medication to help with the pain and swelling. That’s how I got 2 extra days of sick leave so I could get some bed rest. Oh yeah, and doctor assured me I didn’t need surgery. Boy, yeah I got a pretty long break for CNY, but it wasn’t like fun or rewarding. Lying on my side, in bed…checking workmail? Not my kinda holiday if you ask me.

It’s been 3 days since I saw the doctor and the swelling has reduced, pain still there but I’ve been able to sleep more comfortably. I’m now dreading that this will happen again come delivery time. All the tips I’ve been getting is to prevent constipation in the first place—but hey, it has never been this bad…so how to prevent when it’s like the very first time I’m hit by it?

So I went on and read more about it and really…how could I have prevented it? It’s like Mother Nature intended for it to happen to 50% of all pregnant women! It’s like you have a 50-50 chance to kena ok!! 4D also you won’t be so lucky I tell you!!

Babycentre states:

“Hemorrhoids are relatively common during pregnancy. Some women get them for the first time while they’re pregnant — and if you’ve had them before pregnancy, you’re quite likely to have them again now. They may also develop during the second stage of labor, while you’re pushing. Either way, they often go away on their own — or with the help of some simple measures mentioned below — soon after you give birth.

Why are they more common during pregnancy?

Pregnancy makes you more prone to hemorrhoids, as well as to varicose veins in the legs and sometimes even in the vulva, for a variety of reasons. Your growing uterus puts pressure on the pelvic veins and the inferior vena cava, a large vein on the right side of the body that receives blood from the lower limbs. This can slow the return of blood from the lower half of your body, which increases the pressure on the veins below your uterus and causes them to become more dilated or swollen.

Constipation, another common problem during pregnancy, can also cause or aggravate hemorrhoids. That’s because straining leads to hemorrhoids, and you tend to strain when having a hard bowel movement.

In addition, an increase in the hormone progesterone during pregnancy causes the walls of your veins to relax, allowing them to swell more easily. Progesterone also contributes to constipation by slowing down your intestinal tract.”

So now I have to try my best to keep constipation at bay, and hopefully the hemorrhoids will go away and that I won’t get them again when it’s time to push baby out.

—

Photo courtesy of Hafiz @ WOWPhoto

On another note, we got this lovely photo taken by Hafiz of WOWPhoto. He was my classmate in school and he now runs a professional photography business. He was also a graduate of David’s inaugural Social Media Bootcamp. Big things he has done as he successfully achieved 3,000 fans on Facebook, just by utilizing the tips and tools that he picked up at the workshop! We were at his studio yesterday because David had a short interview with him to see how far they’ve come with their social media marketing efforts. Everything seems to be looking good for Hafiz and team! I wish him and his team a roaring Year of the Tiger with more big business coming their way! Find out more about Hafiz and his team on their Facebook page OR their website!

Photo taken by David after my check up. The cops showed up to control traffic flow.

Anyhoo, let’s start with some stats from my check up last weekend:

• EDD is 8 April 2010
• 32 weeks to date (baby will be ready to see the world in as early as week 37!)
• Muffin’s estimated weight is 1.9kgs and is currently head-down (he still has space to move around so hopefully he will not decide to be cheeky and shift his position too much)
• 8 ultrasound scans to date (with 2 printouts + 1 DVD)
• Urine and blood pressure tests & results are normal (within satisfactory range)

As I enter the last trimester, the dreaded backaches have come to haunt me. I’ve been feeling extremely achey at the end of the day. We’re quite glad that all the shopping for baby has been done, so no more walking around malls and hunt for bargains. I’ve also been feeling tired easily, and getting into a comfortable sleeping position has been a real problem. I miss sleeping on my back (cos that’s like the awesomest sleeping position ever, hello!!) and loo visits have become so common, I sometimes can’t fall back asleep after taking a leak. It’s getting harder to get up from the couch and I need David to like help me up. Gosh, feels so heavy and big—dunno how those people on Biggest Loser actually live their lives wei!!

Food cravings aren’t so apparent anymore, and to come to think of it, I never had any particular food aversions during the course of the pregnancy. I do find the taste of coffee a bit peculiar, and perhaps its my body telling me I don’t need this for now. I’ve been eating a lot of high fibre foods to help with avoiding constipation, and thankfully it’s been rather smooth sailing, compared to the 2^nd trimester.

We have also started attending ante-natal class and boy, as much as I thought I was prepared through reading books, I realized there’s so much that I don’t know! We discussed expectations of parenthood, and how to prepare ourselves mentally and physically as the final weeks before delivery is creeping up on us. Our first class also included exercises that will help us prepare for delivery and when caring for baby. We’ve also been taught to count baby kicks and keep track of them so that we can be prepared for any emergencies. I started charting it today, wheeee!

In other news, 2 weeks ago we set up our baby registry, which has been well received and well responded to! Of the 8 items we put up, 7 have been reserved to date! We’re so blessed and grateful to everyone who had picked up an item from the registry.

Now that we’re in the final stretch to Muffin’s arrival, the frequency of the check ups has been reduced to once every 2 weeks. So till my next update, I’d like to wish everyone a very Happy Chinese New Year, and may the year of the Tiger bring you joy and peace!

So we sat down and came this old Chinese lady in her 50s, dressed in a white shirt (somewhat like my secondary school short sleeved white shirt), grey hair, glasses resting on the tip of her nose and speaking in Manglish she took our order. For simplicity sake I’m calling her the CMLWTOO (Chinese Menopausal Lady Who Took Our Order)

She went around the table (there was 15 of us) jotting down the orders and during the whole process from taking our order to waiting for the food to be served to after we were done eating, here’s a snippet of the conversations that took place:

- – - – -

Bosh: Can I have orange juice please?

CMLWTOO: We no have orange juice. (which restaurant doesn’t have orange juice?!?!?!)

Bosh: What do you have?

CMLWTOO: Whatever is in the menu is what we have

- – - – -

Me: I’d like the chicken chop. And can I swap rice with fries?

CMLWTOO: Yours come with fries not rice (with a frown on her face)

Me: Oh…ok. Thanks.

- – - – -

Bosh: Can I have the beef burger? And I’d like to swap the veggies with fries.

CMLWTOO: Sorry, we no have fries, only wedges.

Bosh: You don’t have fries?

CMLWTOO: No fries, only wedges.

Me: Wait a minute, you just said my chicken chop comes with fries? Plus in your menu it says fries?

CMLWTOO: Fries is a simple word. That’s why we use that in the menu. But we no have fries. Just wedges.

Me: (in my mind I was about to throw the pepper and salt shaker at this woman)

Bosh: Ok, wedges is fine with me.

- – - – -

Waiter: (serves everyone a bowl of soup of the day, my Bosh gets a bowl but he wasn’t having the lunch set menu so technically he’s not supposed to get 1)

Bosh: Erm, I ordered a ghoulash.

CMLWTOO: Wait, so you still want your ghoulash? Since you drink the soup already?

Bosh PA: He hasn’t touched it!

Me: Can you take it away and bring his goulash please?

CMLWTOO: (walks away with a tu lan face)

- – - – -

Bosh PA: (as she is sipping her guava juice, CMLWTOO appears….)

CMLWTOO: I think you are drinking apple juice.

Bosh PA: No, its guava juice!

CMLWTOO: No, I think you took your friend’s apple juice

Bosh PA: Hello, I know what I’m drinking ok. You didn’t serve the apple juice to my colleague yet.

CMLWTOO:  (sulking and walks away)

- – - – -

Me: Hi, can I have the dessert menu please?

CMLWTOO: Sorry we only have ice cream

Me: OH-KAY. What flavours do u have?

CMLWTOO: Wait (continues to take coffee and tea orders; of which she suddenly cuts in and says) espresso, sarsi, hazelnut.

Bosh PA: What’s the sarsi one?

CMLWTOO: It’s not sarsi, its Stra-see. Chocolate chip and vanilla (I looked this up on the internet and it’s actually Stracciatella)

Bosh PA: Oh, ok espresso for me

- – - – -

I tell you, I was so pissed with this lady. She was rude, had bad table manners, cocky and think we owe her the world!! Honestly speaking, the mains were mediocre (you could eat it, swallow it, but its not mind blowing) and GAWD the nachos were pathetic! Imagine this – corn chips with sliced olives, with melted cheese on top of ONE corn chip AND sprinkled with green pickled wan tan mee chillies. I almost died.

Bosh’s PA later told us that when she made the booking, and she asked for the name of the person she spoke to (which happened to be CMLWTOO) she merely said “I’m the only lady here”. Double U-Tee-Eff !!!

I award this place for having the worst customer service. Please do not visit Logenhaus for the food is pathetic and you don’t want to endure having to deal with the CMLWTOO. ‘Nuff said.