I’m 21 weeks into my pregnancy, and I’ve been having a lot of dreams. Dreams that don’t make sense. Dreams that are so real, you wake up thinking it is real, then you’re relieved that it isn’t real. And also dreams so unreal, that seemed so real. Well, you get the picture.

Anyway, last night I had one of the weirdest dreams ever. So strange and bizarre I can remember a lot of details from the dream. I’ll start with a bit of background first; I’m playing emcee at @amTaurus‘ wedding this weekend. The weeks and months leading to the wedding both of us have been having crazy dreams (her mostly) and it evolved around how she was late for her wedding, and how she was stranded in a street market looking for her hotel room.

The dream I had last nite also evolved around her wedding. I dreamt that I FFK-ed her. I didn’t show up at the wedding, and then I realised I needed to be there because I was the emcee, I immediately made my way to Westin!! As I got there, somehow @amTaurus was all dressed up in her wedding gown, outside the lobby on the street, making some kung-fu/taekwondo moves. We both caught a glance of each other and she walked over to me. I thought she was going to chop me to pieces. I said sorry, and we immediately went back into the ballroom and me, up to the stage, behind the podium.

I got there in time for the toasting ceremony. There I was, saying my hellos to the guests, and right in front of me, on the lectern, there was a plate with a steak on it. I started to cut up the steak, and described how it was so well marinated and cooked. I then went on and cut up another piece of the steak, picked it up with my hands, and announced to the crowd, “Do you know what’s the best part of the steak? It’s the tendon!”. I might be going mad.

I suspect the steak came into the picture because I was watching Bear Grylls lugging around a leg of deer as he made his way through the Artic, just before I went to bed last night. As for the karate moves that @amTaurus was “performing” right outside the hotel lobby, I really couldn’t figure out why she was doing that.

Other “memorable” dreams I’ve had over the last couple of months included me being stranded in a desert, with my iPhone (yes, I am connected!) and then over the horizon I see a red airplane flying really low, and then it crashes into the sand like right before me. The first thing I did was take a TwitPic and it said “AirAsia crashes right before my eyes”. I didn’t even like walk up to the plane to see if we could find any survivors. I was more concerned about being the 1st one with the news all over Twitter! WTF!

On another occasion, I had delivered Muffin, and we were out and about, Muffin in stroller and then someone came up to me and asked if Muffin was a boy or a girl. I simply looked at David and asked him, “eh, boy or girl ah?”. Obviously … we didn’t know! Goodness me.

I believe I had other dreams which were just as wacko as the ones I’ve just described but chose to forget them cos some were really, not very nice. I think I should write a book using the material from all the dreams I’ve had, and call it “A collection of the world’s weirdest and nonsensical dreams told in simple Manglish”.